goodbye blogspot.

so i decided for th ' new years that i need new things in my life. along with other new things comes a new blog. so good bye blogspot. catch me on wordpress.

www.dearkaye.wordpress.com

r.i.p. brittany murphy.

rolling with th ' homies...

ice cube said it... "today was a good day".

it's been a really long time since i can actually say that i had a great day th ' whole day. saturday was interesting to say th ' least and i got to spend it with some of my favorite people.

i woke up at early as fuck for a saturday and was LA bound to pick up my cousin to roll to th ' american apparel sale. we got there around ten when it started and there was already a bunch of people there. waiting in line and being patient isn't what me and my cousin are good at. we still waited in line for th ' great fucking deals and left with bags of goodies all for a very low price compared to shopping at th ' actual store.

then we made our way to long beach for th ' district 8 holiday event. it was dope. there was a dj, giveaways, food, and i got a free shirt that i love since i rep for my california all day. watched these niggas skate and jerked and pretty much chilled for a couple hours. it was a great day and i had fun. success!

random. part one.

i took a bunch of pictures of myself after i got ready for my day. i guess i was kind of feeling myself. i'm not sure what i'm going to do today but i'm going to find something. but right now i'm blogging to occupy my time. also i'm spending my time looking at all these tumblrs so i decide i was going to copy and paste some of th ' things i've find into this blog post. random? i know. i'm a random person.

alicia keys is really beautiful.

so this poem is from her book  

Tears Of Water

and it's called "prisoner of words unsaid".

amazinggggg.

I’m a prisoner of words unsaid,
Just lonely feelings,
Locked away in my head.

I trap myself further every time I stay……quite,
I shoot, start to speak,
But I stop and stay silent,
And now I’ve made my own hard bed,
Inside this prison,
Of words unsaid.

P.O.W,
That’s what I am,
Not a prisoner of war,
A prisoner of words.

Mostly I say what you wanna hear,
Could you take it,
If I came clear,
Or would you rather see me stoned,
On a drug of complacency and compromise.

M.I.A,
Guess that’s what I am,
Scraping this cold hard earth for a piece of myself,
For peace in myself.

It’d be easy if you just put me in jail,
If you lock me away,
I’d have someone to blame,
But these bars of steal are of my making,
They surround my mind and have me shaking,
My hands are cuffed behind my back,
I’m a prisoner of the worst kind in fact.

I’m a prisoner of compromise,
A prisoner of compassion,
A prisoner of kindness,
A prisoner of expectation,
A prisoner of my youth,
Runs too fast to be old,
I’ve forgotten what I was told,
Ain’t I sight to behold.

A prisoner of age dying to be young,
To my head is my hand with a gun,
And it’s cold and it’s hard,
Cause there’s nowhere to run,
Where you’ve caged yourself,
By holding your tongue.

I’m a prisoner of words unsaid,
Just lonely feelings,
Locked away in my head.

It’s like solitary confinement,
Every time I stay quite,
I shoot, start to speak but I stop,
And stay silent,
And now I’ve made my own hard bed,
Inside this prison of words unsaid.

"hanging out... down th ' street ... th ' same old thing ... that we did last week ..."

if i still smoked i would want to just sit a circle with some friends filiming each other talking just like they did in that 70's show.

this makes me want to go to disneyland even more. and it makes me hungry. grr.

i've always had a thing for mos def.

i guess not everybody likes drake.

classic. cory and topanga? awesome.

why women cry.

A little boy asked his mother, “Why are you crying?” “Because I’m a woman , ” she told him.

“I don’t understand , ” he said. His Mom just hugged him and said , “And you never will.”

Later the little boy asked his father , “Why does mother seem to cry for no reason?”

“All women cry for no reason , ” was all his dad could say.

The little boy grew up and became a man , still wondering why women cry…

Finally he put in a call to God. When God got on the phone , he asked , “God , why do women cry so easily?”

God said

“When I made the woman she had to be special.

I made her shoulders strong enough to carry the weight of the world, yet gentle enough to give comfort.

I gave her an inner strength to endure childbirth and the rejection that many times comes from her children.

I gave her a hardness that allows her to keep going when everyone else gives up , and take care of her family through sickness and fatigue without complaining.

I gave her the sensitivity to love her children under any and all circumstances , even when her child has hurt her very badly.

I gave her strength to carry her husband through his faults and fashioned her from his rib to protect his heart.

I gave her wisdom to know that a good husband never hurts his wife , but sometimes tests her strengths and her resolve to stand beside him unfalteringly.

And finally , I gave her a tear to shed. This is hers exclusively to use whenever it is needed.”

“You see my son , ” said God , “the beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears , the figure that she carries , or the way she combs her hair.

The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes , because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides.”

according to dave letterman.

I don’t know if you’ve heard or watched David Letterman’s Show when he used Filipino-American for his top ten reasons, but this certainly shows we are an emerging group in this diverse society to be featured in Dave’s famous TV show..

TOP TEN: Reasons Why There Couldn’t Be a Filipino-American US President,

10.The White House is not big enough for in-laws and extended relatives.

9. There are not enough parking spaces at the White House for –

2 Honda Civics, 2Toyota Land Cruisers, 3 Toyota Corollas, a Mercedes Benz , BMW , and an MPV (My Pinoy Van).

8. Dignitaries generally are intimidated by eating with their fingers at State dinners …

7. There are too many dining rooms in the White House - where will they put

the picture of the Last Supper?

6. The White House walls are not big enough to hold a pair of giant wooden spoon and fork

5. Secret Service staff won’t respond to ‘psst… psst’ or hoy.hoy hoy

4. Secret Service staff will not be comfortable driving the presidential

car with a Holy Rosary hanging on the rear view mirror, or the statue of the

Santo Nino on the dashboard.

3. No budget allocation to purchase a Karaoke music-machine for every room

in the White House.

2. State dinners do not allow ‘Take Home’.

1. AND THE NUMBER 1 REASON WHY THERE COULDN’T BE A FILIPINO-AMERICAN U.S. PRESIDENT IS…

Air Force One does not allow overweight Balikbayan boxes!

man if you're filipino you know why this shit is hilarious!

juelz santana ft. chris brown - back to th ' crib.

i like this video. glad to see juelz back.
side note: i thought i seen jay-z in this video for a second and was extremely confused. juelz santana, jim jones,  lloyd banks, tony yayo, chris brown, and jay-z all together. th ' video played some more and it wasn't him. looked just like him tho. did ya'll see his look-a-like?

th' bundlr. fuck a snuggie.

i'd rather wear this than a backwards robe.

plus it'll keep my toes warm.

:-)

awesome.

The Colbert Report	Mon - Thurs 11:30pm / 10:30c
Alicia Keys - Empire State of Mind (Part II) Broken Down
www.colbertnation.com
Colbert Report Full Episodes Political Humor U.S. Speedskating

catch me when i fall...

you know when

you’re sitting on a chair

and you lean back

so you’re just on two legs

then you lean too far

and you almost fall over

but at the last second

you catch yourself?

i feel like that all the time. 

i can’t afford to let myself get hurt. 

you know?

this is how i feel about love and relationships. i'm always scared to let somebody fully in and trust them because i'm scared of getting hurt. i really hate that about myself. i know i push people away. now i've found a person who doesn't just let me push them away but actually pulls me in closer. and although i'm scared of trusting this person, i'm more scared of losing this person. i guess that's th ' whole point of love though right? falling but having someone to catch you before you hit th ' ground.

guilty pleasure ; keeping up with th ' kardashians.

th ' new season of keeping up with th ' kardashians premiered last night. i swear this show is my number one guilty pleasure. these females are crazy and i love it.

filipino food.

ok so everybody that knows me personally knows i have a love/hate relationship with filipino food. don't get me wrong i'm definitely proud to be half filipina. my family is always trying to feed me loads of filipino food but i really don't like eating a lot of them. i only eat maybe three or four dishes. some of my favorite dishes include:

lumpia ; which is just filipino style eggrolls. filled with meat and vegetables. fried and dipped in sweet chilli sauce. i could eat enless amounts of these lil fuckers. pretty much my plate at filipino functions is filled with these. i try to make them for myself too but it just takes too long. i just usually buy them at my local seafood city.


pansit ; noodlaes with meat and vegetables cooked in soy sauce. soooooo good. th ' other half of my plate that is not filled with lumpia is filled with a pile of pansit.


leche flan ; dessert pretty much made of eggs, condensed milk, evaporated milk, sugar, and vanilla extract. pretty much a fatt ass orgasm in my mouth. after one bit you can't stop. swear to God.

halo-halo ; dessert i can't really explain what's in it. shaved ice, ice cream, condensed milk, flavored jellies, a peice of leche flan. it's a whole bunch of shit put together. th ' outcome is very delicious. i probably shouldn't have used th ' word shit in my description but trust me when i say that halo-halo is GOOD!

that's pretty much th ' most filipino food that i will ever eat. there will be a few other ones that i'll try if it looks good. but i'm not that into filipino food. i can't stomach th ' thought of eating some filipino food. for example these foods:

adobo chicken ; there's nothing really wrong with it. it just doesn't taste so good to me. it's just boiled chicken in soy sauce and vinegar. it's a pretty basic filipino dish that's a favorite among filipinos except for me.

dinguan; ok this is really gross. apparently a lot of filipinos like it but in my opinion i do not see th ' appeal. it's basically pork cooked in porks BLOOD. yeah i say no to that everytime. plus it's a dark ass brown color that just doesn't sit too well with me.

balut ; this is something i can't stomach. a lot of my family members eat this but it's just disgusting to me. it's an egg that's boiled but instead of actual egg it's a baby chick in there. barely full grown and they get boiled and eaten. suck th ' juice out and shit. oh God. it's gross just thinking about it. especially watching my lil' cousin eat it and tell me th ' head is th ' best part.

lechon ; obviously you can tell what it is. it's a roasted pig. walking into a filipino function and you'll see one of these on th ' table. i just can't stomach cutting into a pig when it's staring at me. blah. almost makes me want to be a vegetarian.

now this is just my taste preference. i don't mean to offend anybody who likes or dsilikes any of these foods. just my personal opinion. everything should at least just be tried once though before making an informed decision.

common - go.

only common can rap about fucking and make it sound like a deeper experience to me.

lauryn hill ; best female rapper.

"I used to do it for the love a long time ago and all I ever wanted was love. I used to love without fear a long time ago and all I ever wanted was love. Then somebody came around and tried to hurt me, tried to make me feel like I was unworthy. Took a pure love and tried to make it dirty. Truth was they never did deserve me."

-Lauryn Hill

story of my life.

words to live by.

"People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you can appreciate them when they’re right. You believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but God and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

west coastttt.

"You can spend hours, days, weeks or even month overseeing a situation; trying to put the peices together, justifying what could of happened or should of happened. or you could leave the peices on the floor and move the fuck on."

Tupac.






there are days when i'll just lay in my room and listen to tupac. i don't think that a rapper has ever gotten to me so deep with his lyrics besides eminem. i wonder what music would be like if he was still alive. or how th ' west coast would be. i really think it'd be way different than what it is now. tupac is just inspiring all around though. one of my favorite rappers of all time.

self love.

masturbation is ok. if men can do it then what's so wrong about females doing it? women talk about themselves masturbating like it's so disgusting. really? i think it's great. if you're horny go for it. i mean really being sexually frustrated just makes you mad so relieve a little bit of stress. it's alright. and if you're single and don't really feel like going out and fucking random men then your hand can be your best friend. or if your man is too far away to give you some loving, loving yourself is th ' way to go. like really? get over it. everybody does it. and it's pretty much th ' safest sex that you can practice other than abstinence. hooray for masturbation!

everybody say awww.

Here’s a funny fact. Join your two hands as shown above.
Let’s start : The thumb represents your parents. Now try seperating them apart, and they’ll easily open. They easily seperate because you are not destined to live with your parents forever. Now join the two thumbs back together.

• The thumb represents your parents. Now try seperating them apart, and they’ll easily open. They easily seperate because you are not destined to live with your parents forever. Now join the two thumbs back together.

• Next, separate your index fingers and they will open too because these fingers represent your siblings, and they’ll also lead their own lives in the future.

• The middle fingers represent yourself.

• Next separate your pinky (little) fingers. These fingers with open as well because, they represent your kids, who will also have a different life from yours, eventually.

• Lastly, try opening your ring fingers. You can’t right, this is because the ring finger represents both you & your spouse & no matter what you’ll remain together for the rest of your life.

what happened nicki?

i'm sorry i really don't get it. i've been hearing all this hype about how great nicki minaj. how she's th ' baddest bitch and such. and i really don't get th ' hype. maybe it's just me but she seems basic to me. nothing special. nothing really seperates her from lil' kim, jackie-o, trina, or foxy brown. lyrically she was dope. i said WAS. i don't know what happened to her. when she first came out she was pretty good. nothing too much different from what i hear from most female rappers. th ' raps about sex and being a ride or die bitch and such. so i repeat i don't really see th ' hype about her. it may sound like i'm hating and i might be. no scratch that. just because i don't like something doesn't mean i'm hating. it just means i don't like something. nicki minaj, to me, has just been going downhill from when she first came out. from music to her style it's just a thumbs down from me. it's just such a difference a couple years makes. from th ' picture below to yesterday on 106th and park above. what happened nicki?

well said.

“See we forgot to teach the kids, the generation up under us, the business of just being cool. See we messed around a let cool go out of style. Now they replaced cool with hard. Now ain’t nobody cool no more, everybody wants to be hard. Once you take cool out the business, cool affects a lot of stuff.”

“Everybody hard now, don’t nobody talk nice no more. It has resulted in the way we talk to women. We don’t talk to women smooth no more ‘cause we ain’t cool no more…”

“We forgot to teach young boys that men dress for women. You dress up so women can look at you and feel nice about you. These boys now, they dress for each other… All that is so your boy can look at you and go, ‘Yeah, that’s hard.’”

-Steve Harvey

these days a man is supposed to be hard or gangster and not respectful. and as women i think that we contribute to that by not valuing our own worth. people have no respect for each other these days but i feel that it's because nobody really earns it.

in my shoes.

"in my shoes, just to see
what its like, to be me
i'll be you, lets trade shoes
just to see what id be like
to feel your pain, you feel mine
go inside each others minds
just to see what we’d find
look at shit through each others eyes
don’t let them say you ain't beautiful
they can all get fucked just stay true to you
don't matter saying you ain't beautiful
they can all get fucked just stay true to you"

-eminem

living to die.

two of my favorite tv shows are law and order: svu and law and order: criminal intent. they always seem to be on and i'm always watching them. all th ' murder, crime, and mystery is all entertaining to me. when watching all th ' stuff happening on tv i never even think that it's a possibility that these crimes could happen to me or people that i know. but it is a possibility. i'm not exactly protecting myself for an attack now i am i? but nobody really is. we just live our lives and that's what we're supposed to do. trying to live in a bubble is almost impossible for most people. we take risks everyday of our lives just stepping out th ' house. in fact we take risks just breathing and living. it's strange to me how some people are so paranoid about th ' world around them. trying to protect themselves and their loved ones from anything that could do them harm. it's hard just living. i sound extremely cynical right now but it's th ' truth. just living is dangerous.

black mamba.

last night my timeline on twitter filled up with nothing but tweets about kobe bryant. obviously because this shot was amazing! but i'm not too surprised. kobe bryant is th ' greatest player in th ' league right now. MVP! another world championship. yeah that's what i think.
watching this shot though... through my perverted mind. a kobe bryant, derek fisher, and shannon brown sandwich sounds kinda nice. haha.